Heal Your Heart Trauma By Recognizing Your Heart Karma
by Kirsten Renee
It's an odd feeling to think about why relationships never work out for yourself. You go through the motions of "self care"; watching rom-coms and pretending as if you don't know why you'll never have a healthy romantic relationship. Listen, I'm the first person to be a hopeless romantic, but still be a shitty partner. I LIVE for Hallmark Christmas movies and I still can't stop watching Pretty Woman ten times a week. However in the same way that I'm a romantic type of bitch, I could be very closed off and wishy washy with potential partners. I've been called a tease by pretty much every person I've involved myself with. I got a kick out of being wanted but never being able to be attainable. However, doing that has caused me to experience what I call "heart karma". You know the phrase "everything you do will always come back to you"? Well it's true, people think that only pertains to being a bad person or doing something wrong. Karmic energy is neither good nor bad, it just is and that's something that most people have yet to understand. I realize it now that my own heart karma has come to hit me in the face with a reality check.
I recently talked to/“dated”/ was interested in a guy that I was into pretty fast, until I realized he embodied every aspect of who I used to be. Distant, closed off, but still intoxicating and it shook me to my core. I was being pulled in by myself to myself, I was dating the person that I was to others and that took me for such a loop that it took me a minute to process it. He's not a bad guy in any way, nor am I bad person for the things that I've done. It's just that sometimes you don't realize that the demons you carry can feed off of the bodies you choose to interact with. Being emotionally detached for a long period of time can be the most draining thing in the world. Karmic energy is just a direct reflection of YOUR actions, and that's a heavy cross to carry once you take the time to acknowledge that. Now that I'm working on getting away from those feelings and allowing my vulnerability to lead me I see how I love differently. I see how I want to be loved differently and that's what growth is all about. Being able to see yourself progress and see how far you've come is sobering.
Allowing myself to be vulnerable and not being afraid of that openness has shifted my heart karma. Facing myself in a way that I have has truly elevated me into a completely different being. Having someone else mirror the exact actions that I had been doing is what did it, and I'm thankful for that lesson. Thankful for the fact that I can easily recognize the patterns that I had carried for so long. Whether we realize it or not, we carry all sorts of trauma with us. Unless we make the CONSCIOUS choice to work through that trauma it'll become exactly who we are, and how we treat ourselves and others.
From an astrological standpoint this moment has been a long time coming in my chart. With Saturn moving into Capricorn, a need to be stable in all areas of my life has become more apparent. However it's not just me that will go through this, every single person on this planet is going to have to face whatever karmic energy they've been putting out. That's the thing about life and recognizing the signs of what's going on in the universe. If you know what to look for, you'll know how to handle it. Saturn is the planet of truth and reality, so of course my disconnect to feelings and personal resentment for them would be thrown back in my face. I asked for this, and truthfully I'm thankful that it happened the way that it did.
2017 was the year of shadow work, it uprooted secrets and lies, it shook foundations that on the outside looked sturdy, it blew through like a tornado on a mission for world destruction. When tornados hit (metaphorically and physically) they leave behind a sense of eerie calmness. It's quiet, it's empty, it's new and scary. . . That's exactly what working with your trauma is like. Working with your shadows is like waking up after a storm has uprooted your life and you now have to figure out your next move.
Be mature in how you approach matters of the heart, here's a tip if you know you've got blockages that are preventing you from evolving fix them. Handle that shit, before the universe just permanently puts you into that place. There's an energy in the air that maybe I'm the only one feeling, but it feels very consistent. It feels like whatever it is that you speak into existence, whatever actions that you do, all of those things are going to be who you are going to become. Be mindful of that type of energy, be mindful of the person that you want to be versus the person that you pretend to be. Because you can very well get stuck in the land of pretend if you're not careful.
Recognize the self destructive patterns that you have attached to yourself, and work on correcting them. If you're like me and you find yourself stuck sometimes on how to move past things in your life here's some of the things that I turn to when I need help at releasing heart trauma and karma.
By focusing on the root of your problem and allowing it to come to the light you're allowing yourself to heal. I like to do 15 minute meditations each day (at least I try to!), and during that time I focus on the subconscious feelings of my spirit. When working with your heart focus on your heart beat pattern, let it lull you into a state of awareness. Whatever energy that arises sink into that and watch how you discover new truths about your heart.
Writing about feelings is a great way to assess them, putting thoughts and energy onto paper or whatever you use can help. Writing can help you look back onto those feelings, and gives you a clearer guideline on what it is that you are experiencing.
3. Etheric Cord Cutting Ritual
There's many ways to do a cord cutting ritual, and that's absolutely okay. Find or create one that speaks the highest to your spirit. It's a pretty simple and easy ritual to do;
- Find a quiet and peaceful space, preferably one where you can be alone!
- Cleanse your area and cast your circle (if you're into that, this isn't just for witches and those who practice)
- Relax your body, focus on breathing deeply and allowing yourself to really fill up your space. I also like to listen to energetic frequencies like this one ! I like to really get into a deep state before casting spells or setting intentions.
- Allow your spirit guides/angels/ ancestors/etc whoever you spiritually work with to come into the now sacred space. Welcome them with open arms and sit with them in prayer and spiritual fellowship.
- Ask them to remove whatever cords that you are connected to that aren't of your highest good. Ask for guidance in releasing that energy and the connection to it, as well as for protection while doing it. I personally like to repeat my spells a specific number of times, it makes me feel comforted.
- After the ritual smudge your space, take a relaxing bath or shower and allow yourself to relax in the vibrations from your ritual.
you can always tweak rituals to your liking and make them your own! Never be afraid to listen to your own intuition for guidance!
If you know you've got negative habits that are stopping you from growing give therapy a shot. Therapy is so helpful when it comes to having someone help you work through your emotions and thought process. Therapy is also a great way to connect with your emotions on a deeper level, and it can really help you heal if you let it!
Remember, healing isn't over night and working through years of trauma can take years to heal. Remain consistent in your work and know that by working through your old experiences you're making room for new ones.
Happy healing, happy hearts.